The point of this law of attraction article is very simple: how to use things you hate to help you get what you want. Briefly, we need to contextualize this so that we’re on the same page, but we’ll end with a suggestion about how to use things you don’t want in order to help bring you the things that you do want. And this is probably the single most helpful tool a person studying law of attraction can have: an instant, powerful reframe about horrible things.
In the law of attraction, knowing what you do and don’t want is extremely important. They’re the basis of getting what you want. And it’s easy to see that if you think about it for a minute: if you don’t know what you want, then you can never know if you got it or not because you’ve never been looking for anything-you’ve just been looking. This aimless looking is often insanely painful, and even when it’s not painful it’s rarely helpful.
Very often, I used to find myself getting mad that I “didn’t get what I wanted”… until I really thought about it and realized that I didn’t just want that thing: I’d also thought about every possible way it could go wrong and what could suck about it. I had thought and thought and thought about how it would fail. So much so that if I actually succeeded in my goals, I wasn’t sure what to do. This happened to me when I was a door-to-door salesperson: I’d get rejected so much that when people wanted to buy, it’d surprise me, and the first thing I’d want to say is, “Really? Seriously? Why?”
And I’d think this because I was never focused on the sale. I was always focused on negative things, like how I was messing up or thinking about if they were still paying attention or what I’d tell my bosses about how they just couldn’t be sold.
I hope you get the picture: I focused on the worst. And so, my days were constantly filled with my nightmares because I was not only attracting them to me in the world, I was bombarding my mind and emotions with terrible feelings about things that hadn’t happened yet-and might not happen!
So, how did I use this?
I focused on all the things that I didn’t want and turned them to positives. For instance, a thought I’ve often had is, “I don’t want people to ignore me.” This is an incredibly negative belief because it’s centered on people ignoring me as well as my want to make people not ignore me. I want to be heard! Rather, a better thought, a thought that’s a desire I can have is “I want to captivate people with my words.” And this is a very powerful desire-a desire that permeates all of my communication including this article.
The belief “I hate stupid people” (something I loathe hearing) could be transformed to “I want to captive everyone around me to constantly raise their level of intelligence” if you’re an idealist like me. Or of course, “I desire to only interact with people of high intellect for periods greater than seven minutes”. Both are things you desire, not things you want to reject.
In order to do this for yourself, simply think of what you don’t want. Then, think of its opposite. This is very often something you do want. If not, think about something somewhat similar until something clicks. You can use this for the worst of your nightmares as promised above. For instance, if you’re deeply afraid of being hurt by others in a physical way, you desire safety and people respecting each other. Or if you fear drowning, maybe you could learn to swim well. If you’re scared of clowns, you could desire to find anything funny regardless of how it made you feel. There really is no right or wrong, just grasp a more positive thought than the one before it.
A major secret to the law of attraction is that feeling bad about things and rejecting them is only good if you use it to eject things from your experience. It has no other purpose: it tells you what you do not want. Harping on what you do not want, however, will draw it to you (even if only in your head… ).